HOLLOW WORSHIP AND EMPTY LIVES

"Then the Lord said, "Because this people draw near with their words and honor Me with their lip service, but they remove their hearts far from Me, and their reverence for Me consists of tradition learned by rote, therefore behold, I will once again deal marvelously with this people, wondrously marvelous; and the wisdom of their wise men will perish, and the discernment of their discerning men will be concealed."  Isaiah 2913-14

What would you think of the man who constantly brings flowers and gifts home to a wife, while he has a mistress on the side?  One day he is praising her for her beauty and devotion and the next night he is having a secret rendezvous in another city hotel.  Would that make you mad?  Would you want to do something about it?

The Lord God through the mouth of the prophet Isaiah is calling His people out for something much worse.  He says that they are just going through the motions in their worship.  Every Sunday in Christian gatherings there are those who lift up heartfelt and genuine worship to God.  Yet, in that same gathering there are those who sing the same songs, listen to the same message and walk the same halls whose hearts and daily lives are far away from God.

Like the wheat and chaff that Jesus speaks of in Matthew 13 you can't tell the difference sometimes, but eventually (in the end) tares show who they really are.  Jesus says,


'Allow both to grow together until the harvest; and in the time of the harvest I will say to the reapers, "First gather up the tares and bind them in bundles to burn them up; but gather the wheat into my barn."'" Matthew 13:30 (NASB)

In Matthew 3:12 Jesus says, "His winnowing fork is in His hand, and He will thoroughly clear His threshing floor; and He will gather His wheat into the barn, but He will burn up the chaff with unquenchable fire."

He calls their worship a farce.  It makes it no farther than the ceiling.  It is in no way the "fragrant aroma" that true worship is meant to be and that God deserves.

He promises to "deal wondrously marvelous" toward them.  What in the world does that mean?  Well it probably doesn't mean what we think it means.  Just as Solomon ask God for wisdom to know how to go out and come in, God will remove that wisdom and discernment.

To be far away from God is to be like that hot ember removed from the fire which eventually grows cold.  He will take away their wisdom and hide their discernment.

James 4:8 (NASB) 
8  Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded. 

Hebrews 7:25 (NASB) 
25  Therefore He is able also to save forever those who draw near to God through Him, since He always lives to make intercession for them. 

Pat Summit Game Changer

Legendary Coach Pat Head Summit died today at the age of 64.  She was the face of Women's Basketball.  Coach Summit changed the game.  According to many of those who played for her, she changed lives.  When she walked into the room or on the court the whole atmosphere changed.

There was a time in my life where I thought I would coach basketball.  During my college days I made preparations to go in that direction.  I also wanted to coach women's basketball.  I watched much high school basketball.  I remember the half court game.  In the 60's and early 70's (and even before) the girls game was played with three guards on one end and three forwards on the other end.  None were allowed to cross half court.  It was a different day and a different game.  It was the way it was and in my opinion exciting.  I remember when the "rover" was added.  The rover was a player that could play both ends resulting in a 4 on 4 game.  RADICAL!

Coach Summit was a player in the evolvement of the women's game.  Today's game has her fingerprints all over it.  5 on 5...the college game...Title IX...and I could go on.  LEGEND, ICON, Role Model, and Hall of Famer are all words that describe her legacy.  Every player she coached that completed their eligibility graduated.  WOW.  How many coaches can claim that.

When our girls were young we lived in South Georgia.  For a number of years the SEC Women's Basketball Tournament was held in Albany, GA.  We are DAWG fans.  In those days it seemed as if UGA and UT were battling for the title and Pat Summit and UT came out on top most of the time.  Our girls looked forward to those days every year.  "Dad, have you got tickets?"  "Dad, are we going?"  We did and I'm glad.

Every person has the opportunity to be a game changer in life.  You may not have the platform that Pat Summit did, but you have influence as a parent, teacher, coach, or friend.

The greatest game changer of all is Jesus Christ.  When He came He changed everything.  When He comes into a life, He changes EVERYTHING.  A game changer that is in a relationship with Jesus Christ has the opportunity daily to influence lives for eternity's sake.

INFLUENCE

Definition: the power to change or affect someone or something: the power
to cause changes without directly forcing them to happen: a person or thing
that affects someone or something in an important way.

All of us have influence.  We have influence over some things and some
people.  That influence can be positive or negative.  We influence people
through leading, conversing and relating.

Influence is a powerful tool if used properly. Today people are influenced by
friends, athletes, politics, ads, Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterist.  People listen
to talk radio and watch late night TV.  Influence is hot, diverse and divisive.
Where does your influence lie?  Who listens when you speak?  Who values
your opinion, lifestyle and choices?  You may not think you have influence,
but you are wrong.  You have some influence and much more than you
think.  You are also influence by others to some degree.

Every day we influence others.  That influence can be positive or negative.
The person at church who is always putting down their pastor has a negative
influence on those who listen to them.  The person who is supportive has a
positive influence.

Influence is not “all-powerful”, but it is out there and it does have an effect.
The Apostle Paul in Romans 16 sends greetings to a long list of friends in
that church.  These were his brothers and sisters in Christ and people he had
influenced and I’m sure vice versa.  I am particularly intrigued with “Rufus”
in verse 13.  There is great reason to believe that this is the same Rufus,
son of Simon of Cyrene who carried the Lord’s cross to Calvary.  Imagine the
impact that Simon’s influence had on his son growing up in that house.  Paul
calls him “a choice man in the Lord.”  


 

Pastoral Termination

A part of my ministry assignment is working with both churches and pastors.  My desire is to help churches and pastors "get it right."  

Pastoral termination is epidemic.  Sometimes it is warranted, many times it is unavoidable, but more times than not it is a power move that dishonors God, hurts both the minister and the church and causes a lost world to look at the church and say "I want no part of this."

In the following article Joe McKeever deals with this subject in a healthy and honest manner.  

"The committee could not find any specific reasons they wanted the pastor to leave.  Church attendance was healthy, the congregation was responding well to the minister’s leadership, and finances were in line with expectations.  But there was an undercurrent of dissatisfaction with the preacher, and had been since day one.

“You’re just not a good fit for our church” was all the committee could come up with.

They wanted him out. If he refused to go peacefully, a movement would be started to oust him forcibly.

If this sounds unlikely to readers, let me assure you it happens quite often.

The wife of a youth minister texted me recently with a similar story about her husband.  The administrator and personnel chair had visited him that evening to cut him loose upon just this basis–“you’re not a good fit for our church.”  They informed him the pastor would meet with him the next morning to discuss details of his severance.

Just so easily are leaders willing to toy with the lives and ministries of God-called servants as well as with the health, unity, and reputation of His churches.

In many cases, what “you’re not a good fit” means is that certain members simply dislike the minister.  And since they do not like him, clearly, the solution is for him to go back where he came from.

The presumption of some people is truly amazing.

However, for the sake of this discussion, let us assume the delegation visiting the minister to inform him of the misalignment between himself and the congregation is sincere and well-intentioned.

Let’s assume they want to do the right thing.

Here are some thoughts for them to consider….

1) First, figure out what that means. “The pastor is not a good fit for us” is too general, too fuzzy, too arbitrary.  No doubt plenty of people in the church find he “fits” them just fine. So, what does this mean?

Is it about style or substance? Is it doctrinal and basic, or superficial and changeable?

The well-intentioned leaders of the church–those who want to do the right thing here–should not let their colleagues off the hook with the “not a good fit” accusation.  Make them get specific.

Don’t be surprised if it comes down to something superficial and flimsy like: The women do not like the way his wife dresses; He did not go to the right school; He neglected to honor a certain family in the church; or, worst of all, he wants to live simpler than we want our pastor to live (I mean, look at the neighborhood where they bought a house! And they’re sending their children to public school, if you can believe that!).

2) Even if the misalignment is genuine, this can be good for a church.

A “fit” that is too comfortable can be a sedative.  You want the pastor to be different, stronger, godlier, and with better spiritual vision than the rest of the church.  You want the pastor to be a pusher, a change agent, one who asks questions and wonders “why don’t we do something about this?”

What  you do not want is a spiritual leader who is too impressed with you the membership, too thrilled with the prestige of pastoring “this great church,” and too excited with himself for being named your pastor.

Pastors are instruments of a holy God sent to lead us, to prod us, to teach us, to comfort us when we need it and to hound us when we are straying.

3) Even so, what “I” want and what “you” want in the pastor has nothing to do with anything. The only question is: Did God send that person to the church?

If God sent him,* please do the Lord the honor of getting out of his way. Do yourself a favor and get on board.  Do the church a favor and stand up to those who would oust him because they don’t like the way he ties his tie (or the fact that he doesn’t wear one at all!) or wears his shirts outside his jeans (jeans! horrors!).

The next time you find yourself on a committee that is a) working against the pastor, b) seeking to oust the pastor, or c) trying to change the pastor, ask yourself the big question: Why?

Why are we doing this? Who is behind this? Do they have ulterior motives or are they sincerely trying to do the Lord’s will? Will the effect of this be to bless that minister’s service for Christ or handicap it? Is this worthwhile?

Then ask it of the others on the committee. And do not take anything less than a solid answer.

There are times I will ask my grandchildren a question about their day, their grades, or some activity they’re involved in.  Often I will preface it with this:  “I want to ask you something. And you are not allowed to say, ‘I don’t know.’ I want an answer.” (When done in love and with a sweet spirit, it generally produces the desired effect.)

Sometimes we have to treat our colleagues in church leadership like children and ask for their reasons for what they are doing.

4) Before leaving the subject, let’s state the obvious: It is possible for a pastor to be wrong for a church. (Thought I’d never come to that, didn’t you? Smiley-face here.)

Perhaps your church is conservative and the pastor is liberal. Your church is Baptist and the pastor is a Jehovah Witness.  Your church is mission-minded and the pastor is anti-missions.  Your church is in dire need of hands-on leadership and the pastor wants to live in the next town and drive in on weekends.

Nothing about this is good.

Let’s admit the obvious here: Sometimes pastor search committees make huge mistakes.  And pastors make mistakes too by going to churches they know they are wrong for.

When this happens, the lay leadership of the church has a major responsibility of dealing with it.  They should approach it cautiously with prayer and fasting, seeking the Lord’s direction on how to proceed. They will want to call in outside counsel from the denomination and other veteran leaders who will have insights on how to proceed.  Let them do nothing precipitously and disruptively, but go forward in faith and love, admitting their mistakes and seeking to bless everyone involved.

Let them do nothing to handicap the ministry of a God-called servant, even if it is the unanimous decision that he needs to leave.

Pray for our leaders. Pray for our pastors. Pray for yourself, that the Lord will guide your steps and “help you to walk on your high places” (Habakkuk 3:19).

(*Note: As always, I write from the standpoint of a Southern Baptist. We do not have women pastors, although women serve in leadership positions and on church staffs.  Many good churches doing the work of the Lord do have women pastors.)

1) First, figure out what that means. “The pastor is not a good fit for us” is too general, too fuzzy, too arbitrary.  No doubt plenty of people in the church find he “fits” them just fine. So, what does this mean?

Is it about style or substance? Is it doctrinal and basic, or superficial and changeable?

The well-intentioned leaders of the church–those who want to do the right thing here–should not let their colleagues off the hook with the “not a good fit” accusation.  Make them get specific.

Don’t be surprised if it comes down to something superficial and flimsy like: The women do not like the way his wife dresses; He did not go to the right school; He neglected to honor a certain family in the church; or, worst of all, he wants to live simpler than we want our pastor to live (I mean, look at the neighborhood where they bought a house! And they’re sending their children to public school, if you can believe that!).

2) Even if the misalignment is genuine, this can be good for a church.

A “fit” that is too comfortable can be a sedative.  You want the pastor to be different, stronger, godlier, and with better spiritual vision than the rest of the church.  You want the pastor to be a pusher, a change agent, one who asks questions and wonders “why don’t we do something about this?”

What  you do not want is a spiritual leader who is too impressed with you the membership, too thrilled with the prestige of pastoring “this great church,” and too excited with himself for being named your pastor.

Pastors are instruments of a holy God sent to lead us, to prod us, to teach us, to comfort us when we need it and to hound us when we are straying.

3) Even so, what “I” want and what “you” want in the pastor has nothing to do with anything. The only question is: Did God send that person to the church?

If God sent him,* please do the Lord the honor of getting out of his way. Do yourself a favor and get on board.  Do the church a favor and stand up to those who would oust him because they don’t like the way he ties his tie (or the fact that he doesn’t wear one at all!) or wears his shirts outside his jeans (jeans! horrors!).

The next time you find yourself on a committee that is a) working against the pastor, b) seeking to oust the pastor, or c) trying to change the pastor, ask yourself the big question: Why?

Why are we doing this? Who is behind this? Do they have ulterior motives or are they sincerely trying to do the Lord’s will? Will the effect of this be to bless that minister’s service for Christ or handicap it? Is this worthwhile?

Then ask it of the others on the committee. And do not take anything less than a solid answer.

There are times I will ask my grandchildren a question about their day, their grades, or some activity they’re involved in.  Often I will preface it with this:  “I want to ask you something. And you are not allowed to say, ‘I don’t know.’ I want an answer.” (When done in love and with a sweet spirit, it generally produces the desired effect.)

Sometimes we have to treat our colleagues in church leadership like children and ask for their reasons for what they are doing.

4) Before leaving the subject, let’s state the obvious: It is possible for a pastor to be wrong for a church. (Thought I’d never come to that, didn’t you? Smiley-face here.)

Perhaps your church is conservative and the pastor is liberal. Your church is Baptist and the pastor is a Jehovah Witness.  Your church is mission-minded and the pastor is anti-missions.  Your church is in dire need of hands-on leadership and the pastor wants to live in the next town and drive in on weekends.

Nothing about this is good.

Let’s admit the obvious here: Sometimes pastor search committees make huge mistakes.  And pastors make mistakes too by going to churches they know they are wrong for.

When this happens, the lay leadership of the church has a major responsibility of dealing with it.  They should approach it cautiously with prayer and fasting, seeking the Lord’s direction on how to proceed. They will want to call in outside counsel from the denomination and other veteran leaders who will have insights on how to proceed.  Let them do nothing precipitously and disruptively, but go forward in faith and love, admitting their mistakes and seeking to bless everyone involved.

Let them do nothing to handicap the ministry of a God-called servant, even if it is the unanimous decision that he needs to leave.

Pray for our leaders. Pray for our pastors. Pray for yourself, that the Lord will guide your steps and “help you to walk on your high places” (Habakkuk 3:19).

(*Note: As always, I write from the standpoint of a Southern Baptist. We do not have women pastors, although women serve in leadership positions and on church staffs.  Many good churches doing the work of the Lord do have women pastors.)

IS IT GOOD OR IS IT GOD?

Are you investing your time and efforts into good things or God things?  In other words are you seeking God for what He wants you to do or are you just doing good stuff because others are doing it and having success?  Too many times churches ride on the coattails of other churches and expect the same results.  What God is doing in one place does not necessarily mean that He will duplicate it where you are. 

There is a big difference between the “Discovered Will of God” and the “Developed plan of man.”  One is God breathed the other is man conceived.  One is sought out through prayer the other is developed though man’s ingenuity.  One produces fruit that honors God while the other produces results that puffs up man.

Someone has said that God could remove the Holy Spirit from the church today and most churches would continue with business as usual. 

If programs would reach the world with the gospel, Southern Baptists would be way ahead of the game.  We need God anointed, prayer produced movements from God.  We serve a Sovereign God who works all things well. He has said that He will build His church and the gates of hell will not prevail against it.

Listen to what God says through his preacher (Jeremiah 29:11-12):

'For I know the plans that I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.  'Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you.  'You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.

© Harris R. Malcom

MISSIONARY MENTALITY

I remember the day I was saved.  In the midst of the post conversion conversation my pastor said that the next step was to make my decision public and be baptized.  Shortly after I attended a new member class and since then I have been a “church member.”

I love His church.  I cherish the privilege of being a member of the body of Christ.  I believe that we should take our church membership commitment seriously. 

Jesus planted His church and has promised that the gates of hell shall not prevail against it.  As we look into the early days of the church we find a people who were “continually devoting themselves to the apostles teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer” (Acts 2:42).  We find them “being” the church, “continuing with one mind” and “praising God and having favor with all the people. And the Lord was adding to their number day by day those who were being saved” (Acts 2:46-47).

As important as church membership is, there is little evidence in scripture that we are called to be “church members.” But there is overwhelming evidence that we are called to be “church missionaries.”

“I was made a minister, according to the gift of God's grace which was given to me according to the working of His power. … to preach to the Gentiles the unfathomable riches of Christ” (Ephesians 3:7-8).

 

“Now there were at Antioch, in the church that was there, prophets and teachers: Barnabas, and Simeon who was called Niger, and Lucius of Cyrene, and Manaen who had been brought up with Herod the tetrarch, and Saul.  While they were ministering to the Lord and fasting, the Holy Spirit said, "Set apart for Me Barnabas and Saul for the work to which I have called them."  Then, when they had fasted and prayed and laid their hands on them, they sent them away” (Acts 13:1-3).

 

The Great Commission says “Go” but we have turned it into “come.”  The Book of Acts paints the picture of the church gathering for prayer, fellowship and edification, but very quickly they went out as church missionaries. 

As a Great Commission Resource Center, a church is commissioned to the glorious task of Global Redemption.  That means that everything we do as His church should focus on getting people to church and ultimately to Christ.

As clear as this is in scripture we have created a culture of maintenance rather than a culture of missions.  We may believe in missions, support missions even go on mission, but in order for us to function as a GCRC we must go through a paradigm shift in our mental model.

©Harris R. Malcom

DOES YOUR CHURCH GPS NEED AN UPDATE?

Updating a GPS can be simple or complicated, free or costly, beneficial or no help at all.  It all depends on the make, model and newness of your device.  Regardless, if you don’t update your device you run the risk of being uninformed and out of the loop of new roads and information that could be crucial in reaching your destination. 

A Global Positioning Device (GPS) is used to help navigate us from Point A to Point B and all destinations in between.  With satellite technology and supposed pin point accuracy signals bounce back and forth and “Walla” there it is on your device screen.

As a Great Commission Resource Center, the church needs to update their GPS often.  New ideas, new resources and proven methods are available to help God’s people implement the vision that God has given to assist them in completing that Acts 1:8 Challenge that has not changed.

Your Regional State Missionaries are available to assist you, resource you and come along beside to help you in any way you need to reach your Jerusalem, Judea, Samaria and even the remotest part of the earth.

 

©Harris R. Malcom

Being a Missional Christian

Being a Great Commission Christian is about letting Him live out His life through you in the everyday fabric of life.  It is being authentic as well as relational as we do life at home, work and play.  It involves persistence and sensitivity. 

It happens at the local recreation complex while watching your child’s T-ball game.  It can begin and develop over time as you relate to fellow civic club members in the ongoing activities of a particular civic club.  Whether you are into hunting, fishing, flea markets or NASCAR you are not alone.  There are other believers around, but more importantly there are also lost people who need Jesus. 

The Great Commission is about penetrating darkness.  It is about getting the Good News of Jesus Christ to a lost and dying world.  There is more than one way to do this, but one way is right in the middle of what we are already doing.

Jeff Iorg, in his book, “Live Like A Missionary” writes, “A missional Christian connects with people and prioritizes building relationships with unbelievers – not just being in their general vicinity and hoping for the best.”

What does all this mean? 

·         It means that we must be about having meaningful conversations about Jesus in the daily routines of life. 

·         It means staying off that smartphone sometimes to engage that person with conversations about life and the LIFEGIVER. 

·         It involves patience and persistence in planting gospel seeds, answering life questions and praying for the Spirit of God to bring conviction and conversion.

©Harris R. Malcom

I AM A ROYAL AMBASSADOR

 

As a boy growing up in a Southern Baptist Church I became a part of Royal Ambassadors. Although not the same, there are similarities to the Boy Scouts of America. As a matter of fact I served a church one time that had both a BSA Troop and Royal Ambassadors and we had young men who were members of both. I never asked the BSA to recognize the work of the R.A.'s but we did accept like kind accomplishment from BSA to R.A.'s (eg. ropes, crafts, camping, etc).

One of the first things I learned was the R.A. Motto: "We are Ambassadors for Christ."

Then there was the R.A. Pledge: "As a Royal Ambassador I will do my best to become a well-informed, responsible follower of Christ; to have a Christlike concern for all people; to learn how to carry the message of Christ around the world; to work with others in sharing Christ; and to keep myself clean and healthy in mind and body."

I was a Cub Scount had many friends who were in Boy Scouts and eventually I joined the BSA. I was extremely close to attaining to the status of "Tenderfoot" which I believe was one of the first levels. I soon dropped out because I had too much on my plate and my school work was suffering so something had to go (by the direction of my parents).

As I look back over the years scouting has had a great impact on many lives. I had the privilege of being pastor to a number of Eagle Scouts and participating in their Eagle ceremony. I have had the utmost respect for scouting. However, last week scouting decided to commit suicide. They may not know it, but that one decision killed the Boy Scouts of America.

Baptist Press recently ran an article in light of BSA's recent decision on allowing gay scouts. It is worth the read. Here is the link:http://www.bpnews.net/BPnews.asp?ID=39606

The Right Perspective

One night a father was relaxing with newspaper in hand after a long day in the office.  His son, who wanted to play, kept on pestering him.  Finally, fed up, the father ripped out a picture of the “world globe” that filled a whole page in the paper and tore it in many pieces.  ‘here son, go ahead and try to put this back together,’ he said, hoping this would keep the little boy busy long enough for him to finish reading the paper.  To his amazement, his son returned after only one minute with the globe perfectly reassembled.  When the startled father asked how he achieved this feat, the child smiled gently and replied, ‘Dad, on the other side of the globe there was a picture of a person, and once I got the person together, the world was okay.” Merry Christmas!

MOVING

As we prepare to move our belongings from Americus it has become obvious to us that we cannot move everything.  There is not room for everything.  Therefore, we are making some things available for sale.  The furniture and appliances were all purchased 12 years ago, one year prior to our move to Americus.  We also have a Maytag washer and dryer (SOLD) that is not pictured.  The outdoor furniture does not include the grill.  The kitchen piture includes the refrigerator freezer and table and 4 chairs.

Prices are not listed.  If you see something you like, make an offer and we can talk.

Here they are: 

Recliner

3 piece TV cabinet

Love Seat and end table



SOLD - Sofa Table



Will sell as set or separate
SOFA - SOLD

Refrigerator and Dinette
DINETTE - SOLD

Outdoor Furniture

What To Do When You Don't Know What To Do?

A colleague of mine preaches a sermon entitled, "What To Do When You Don't Know What To Do."  We all have been there.  Some of you may be there right now.  If you aren't you probably will be at some time.  Life has a way of putting us there.  God has a way of allowing us to be there.

I meet with pastors often that find themselves there.  Is God through with me here?  Should I prepare my resume for distribution?  Should I dig in and fight the opposition here in the church?  Should I just get out of the way?  Why is this happening to me?  Why did this happen to me?  All real questions and all questions that are being asked.

Remembering Church As I Use To Be

While making pastoral visits the other day I happened to go by a church that is meeting in the facilities of my old home church.  Although the name has changed the place is still very much the same.  Memories began to flash through my mind as I sat in the "sanctuary" with the pastor.  I sat in the vacinity where I sat on a particular Sunday evening after praying in the pastors office to receive Christ. I would make my public confession of faith that night.

CHANGES

When you mention the word change you can get all kinds of responses.  Someone has said that the only person that likes change is a wet baby.  The older I get the more I like things to be constant and consistent.  However, over the last few years we have experienced more change and we see more on the way. 

One change coming our way has to do with my dad.  He is the only living parent that Phyllis and I have between us. Life has been good to dad.  His health has been relatively good until the last couple of years.  He has been active and on the go.  That has changed and we find ourselves on the verge of moving closer to him to provide care.  Fortunately for us our ministry role allows us to do that. 

THANKFUL

Celebrating Thanksgiving as a holiday and giving thanks are as different as night and day.  The holiday (it seems) has become a bump on the way to Christmas.  Black Friday and Cyber Monday as well as football games headline the day.  There is food and there are family gatherings that we work in.

Thanksgiving as a holiday for our family always meant...FAMILY!  It also meant travel.  Before kids, with kids and after kids we traveled.  One car, van, two cars and even four to five cars from our family would show up at Granny's (Phyllis' mom) and soon aunts and uncles, neices and nephews were close behind.  It got loud, it got crowded and you had better be ready to be flexible and watch plans change in seconds (I was never ready).  Today, although locations change and there are some who are not with us anymore and others just from time to time...we get together.  Yeah, we travel...at least for the time being.  Hopefully, one day we will live closer.